Kouta

Some minor cleanups: 1. Piercing: The negation...the cost reduction is too steep to also give them a chance to retain their setup and main phase while ALSO giving them 4 uses. I suggest a compromise: -- 2 Uses like any other RPJ and retain the same cost & chance to keep MPA -- x Uses (rank) but replace the cost formula with (60-5y%), so that cost is ultimately 40% of the base cost. Keep % chance for MPA the same. -- 4 uses, keep cost formula the same, take away MPA with no chance of recouping. Keep Set-Up. Then clarifying question: If its 80% chance to lose their main phase...are they trying to roll 81+ or are they trying to roll 19-? 2. Radiance: 20% of 30% or 20% of 10% is really ugly math to do. Can we flip this to "Costs of RPJ used in response to the user's Light jutsu are increased by 6x%. Light jutsu heal 2x%" Just write it out so it is easier for people to calculate. I'm still against giving Light consecutive uses. You knock 4 SP off the cost of Light and get it early with this effect, thats benefit enough. Otherwise you have a setup that more or less encourages you to lock the enemy out of RPJ by way of cost manipulation. If you start running regen or cost enhancing statii alongside this it gets really gross and punishing. 3. Focusing: This is more a question of confusion than anything else. You specify they can create a set trap in this way rank/times per battle. But they can only store a jutsu when Tenkingan is activated. So do you expect them to turn off their eye then turn it back on repeatedly to store jutsu multiple times? Or is it more of a failsafe effect in case someone turns off their eye? Whats the design philosophy there?

Shokushuken | Kraken’s Fist Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam ] Rank: Genin Cost: 60 Chakra Damage: 60 Ghost Damage Effect: N/A Description: Raising an arm, the practitioner will swing downwards towards their opponent. As they do, steam will gather around their arm in the shape of a tentacle, which will lash out and slam the scalding hot liquid into contact with the enemy. The attack has no physical substance and will break up against the enemy like nothing more than an angry wind, but contact with the chakra laden tentacle will send a sharp pain through their mind, which will receive the unmistakable sensation of being smacked by the sea-faring appendage. Cost: 3 JP Shokushuken II | Kraken’s Fist II Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam ] Rank: Chunnin Cost: 112 Chakra Damage: 90 Ghost Damage Effect: Target is afflicted with ‘Prone’ and ‘Fazed’ for 1 Turn. Description: Raising an arm, the practitioner will swing downwards towards their opponent. As they do, steam will rise from the ground next their arm in the shape of a thick tentacle, which will lash out and slam the scalding hot liquid into contact with the enemy. The attack has no physical substance and will break up against the enemy like nothing more than an angry wind, but contact with the chakra laden tentacle will send a sharp pain through their mind, which will receive the unmistakable sensation of being smashed to the ground. Cost: 4 JP [ Evolving 1; Shokushuken ] Shokushuken III | Kraken’s Fist III Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam ] Rank: Jounin Cost: 255 Chakra Damage: 270 Ghost Damage Effect: Target is ‘Fazed’ and afflicted with ‘Prone’ and ‘Slow’ for 1 Turn. Description: Raising an arm, the practitioner will swing downwards towards their opponent. As they do, steam will rise from the ground behind them in the shape of a massive tentacle, which will slam scalding hot vapors against the enemy. The attack has no physical substance and will break up against the enemy like nothing more than an angry wind, but contact with the chakra laden tentacle will send a sharp pain through their mind, which will receive the unmistakable sensation of being smashed to the ground by something massive, heavy, and subaquatic. Cost: 6 JP [ Evolving 2; Shokushuken II ] Shokushuken IV | Kraken’s Fist IV Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam ] Rank: Sennin Cost: 535 Chakra Damage: 600 Ghost Damage Effect: Target is ‘Fazed’ and afflicted with ‘Prone’ and ‘Slow’ for 2 Turns. Description: Raising an arm, the practitioner will swing downwards towards their opponent. As they do, steam will rise from the ground behind them in the shape of a tentacle thicker than most trees, which will slam scalding hot vapors against the enemy. The attack has no physical substance and will break up against the enemy like nothing more than an angry wind, but contact with the chakra laden tentacle will send a sharp pain through their mind, which will receive the unmistakable sensation of being smashed to the ground by something massive, heavy, and subaquatic. Most bodies will react in kind, being driven into the earth as if the blow were physical. Cost: 8 JP [ Evolving 2; Shokushuken III ] ----- Costs! KF 1 60 GD at 1:1 = 60 = 3 JP KF 2 90 GD at 4:5 = 72 Prone = 25 Fazed = 15 72 + 15 + 25 = 112 = 4 JP KF 3 270 at 2:3 = 180 Prone = 25 Fazed = 15 Slow = 35 180 + 25 + 15 + 35 = 255 = 6 JP KF 4 600 at 2:3 = 400 Prone x 2 = 50 Slow x 2 = 70 Fazed = 15 400 + 50 + 70 + 15 = 535 = JP

Thank you for clarifying the wording, because that wasn't clear as written. It sounded like an error, wherein you bought the technique for [Stat], but you had written that you can choose any stat every time you use it. approved cuz I can do that!

Moro Fukumen | Hazy Veil Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam | AoE ] Rank: Genin Cost: 60 Chakra Damage: 5 Ghost Damage Effect: All targets are afflicted with 'Impaired Eyesight' for 1 Turn. If the climate is currently "Mist", "Heavy Rain", or "Monsoon", reduce the cost of this technique by 20 Chakra. RP Effect: The user's form becomes shadowlike and hazy; harder to notice or identify. Description: With a gentle outpouring of steam, a skilled ninja will create a near solid column of the misty particles before layering an illusion over them that reflects light away from the caster. This makes their form appear like a shadow to anyone who sees them; misty and hard to determine any details. Those who look at it directly may receive a disorienting headache as their eyes and brain try to pierce the hasty illusion. Cost: 3 JP Kiri Fukumen | Misty Veil Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam | AoE ] Rank: Chunnin Cost: 114 Chakra Damage: 10 Ghost Damage Effect: All targets are afflicted with 'Impaired Eyesight' for 2 Turns. If the climate is currently "Mist", "Heavy Rain", or "Monsoon", reduce the cost of this technique by 20 Chakra. RP Effect: The user's form becomes semi transparent; hard to notice or identify. Description: Creating an amorphous bubble of steam, a skilled ninja will create an illusion over the individual water droplets that reflects light away from the caster. Any part of their body obscured by the misty blob instead looks like a mirror image of the landscape; as if they weren't even there. The edges of the jutsu are incomplete, and the misty blob does have a few openings that might be spotted by a lucky opponent while the ninja is moving and the illusion is forced to re-adjust. Those who look at it directly may receive a disorienting headache as their eyes and brain try to pierce the illusion. Cost: 4 JP [Evolving 1; Moro Fukumen] Kirameku Fukumen | Shimmering Veil Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam | AoE ] Rank: Jounin Cost: 360 Chakra Damage: 15 Ghost Damage Effect: All enemy targets are afflicted with 'Blind' for 1 Turn and 'Headache' for 2 turns. If the climate is currently "Mist", "Heavy Rain", or "Monsoon", reduce the cost of this technique by 20 Chakra. RP Effect: The user's form becomes invisible. Description: Layering their form with a tight skin of steam, a skilled ninja will create an illusion over each individual water droplet that reflects light away from the caster. Effectively invisible, the illusion crafts a perfect image of the space directly behind the user, and the veil shifts as the caster moves. Occasionally the illusion will cause little shimmers of light to ripple across its surface as light refracts weirdly through the dewy veil. Those who even notice the subtle distortion in the air may receive a disorienting headache as their eyes and brain try to pierce the utterly alien illusion. Cost: 8 JP [Evolving 4; Kiri Fukumen] Kagami Fukumen | Mirror Veil Type: Genjutsu [ Elemental; Steam | AoE ] Rank: Sennin Cost: 760 Chakra Damage: 15 Ghost Damage Effect: All enemy targets are afflicted with 'Blind' for 2 Turns and 'Migraine' for 2 turns. If the climate is currently "Mist", "Heavy Rain", or "Monsoon", reduce the cost of this technique by 20 Chakra. RP Effect: The user's form becomes invisible. Description: Layering their form with a tight skin of steam, a skilled ninja will create an illusion over each individual water droplet that reflects light away from the caster. Effectively invisible, the illusion crafts a perfect image of the space directly behind the user, and the veil shifts as the caster moves. Those who even notice the subtle distortion in the air may receive a pulsing migraine as their eyes and brain try to pierce the utterly alien illusion. Cost: 12 JP [Evolving 4; Kirameku Fukumen] ----- Costs! The "if in climate discount 20 chakra" was just me ballparking. Mist is 30/turn, HR is 50/turn, and Monsoon is 80/turn, so I shot for something cheaper than the lowest common denominator, which is Mist. Feel free to suggest a different number. Hazy Veil I.E. = 15 5 GD = 5 20 x 3[Aoe] = 60 = 3 JP Misty Veil I.E. x2 = 30 10 GD = 8 38 x 3 (Aoe) = 114 = 4 JP Shimmering Veil Blind x1 = 50 Headache x 2 = 30 15 GD = 10 90 x 4(Aoe enemy only) = 360 = 8 JP Mirror Veil Blind x2 = 100 Migraine x2 = 80 15 GD = 10 190 x 4(Aoe enemy only) = 760 = 12 JP

"The decreased stat is chosen when this technique is PURCHASED" you mean.

I have made the requested change to stored pattern (requiring soseigan). I've also updated the wording on the skill to be more clear as to what I mean. When you yoink the element, you also temporarily yoink the effects of any skill you need to use that tag. Meaning, if, say, you yoinked [Lotus], you'd temporarily gain the effect of the lotus style skill. That skill allows you to generate charges, which, at first glance, does nothing. But if I block a [Lotus] while I already have a [Lotus] Charge (cuz they only go away if I attain other charges in a another style) then I gain temporary access to the Lotus Style Skill AGAIN and it has the ability to spend Lotus Charges for effects. Which I'd get to use during that main phase only. It is highly situational, and won't always be effective, but it can pay off in cool, niche ways. I'm more interested in yoinking your elements, but mechanically there's no reason why I should exclude taijutsu users from an Advanced System they could reasonably employ IN ADDITION, you are right. It's not my plan, but it absolutely could be the plan of someone to make a Taijutsu user with this bloodline, and a "Wild Style" that spends other styles' tai charges could be very cool and thematic. Not my ghost, not my gig, but the option is out there.

At present this isn't really a skill locked Jutsu, since not all of your jutsu require "perfected gatsuga" to learn and "perfected gatsuga" does not confer on you the ability to learn "Gatsuga", it actually just makes the jutsu able to exist/makes the jutsu better, so its more like a mastery skill than a skill locked jutsu. So there's some grey area in this framework. That said, all of these jutsu are 2 jutsu: When in this situation, do A, but when in this situation do B. That's a choice mechanic. You don't control the choice mechanic, but its a choice mechanic from 5.0-ish land where everyone was like "I want my jutsu to always be useable no matter what my opponent does!" So you'll need to, at the very least, double all these JP costs. Also, when you're hitting a barrier, and this extra damage breaks the barrier...what happens? Does your bonus damage carry over to the opponent? Because 35% total additional damage is very close to just declaring a critical hit without Strategist.

yea, sure. approved

In response to clarification on Disassembly: Yes. If you have an ability that says "When a [Desert Aikido] technique hits the opponent, you gain 1 "Counter" charge." or "When your [Fire] technique hits an opponent, it also inflicts the "Burned" status for 1 turn." Then Soseigan turns those off. Because you hit with a "Styleless" or "Void" technique, not a "Desert Aikido" or "Fire" technique. If you have abilities that say "When you USE a [Wood] ninjutsu you gain 1 "Essence of Wood" on the field." That ability works JUST FINE because you did USE a wood technique on your turn and that effect already happened. I just did not get HIT by a Wood technique on my turn. I got hit by a Void technique. So if you also had a skill that said "When your opponent is hit by a [Wood] Technique they also suffer "Bound Arm" for 1 turn." that skill would no longer function. In response to clarification of "Improved Detection": Yes. It only activates on the turn you use Disassembly and only lasts 1 turn. And you can only use Disassembly when the AS is turned on. So yes, you can only use this when the AS is turned on. It is essentially: Normally this Bloodline gives you Block +20. When you use Disassembly, it becomes Block +25 for 1 turn. I removed "Secondary Disassembly" and will sub it as a separated RPJ that requires the bloodline. That seems cleaner. Instead I added "Stored Pattern" which is when I block an attack, I can choose one of the tags on that attack and add it to my own attack in the main phase that turn. I feel like thats way more doable because A: My enemy controls it, and B: I have to get hit in order to block.

Took one rank of "(Kn)owledge of the (Kn)ages" and adjusted ledgers to account.

Collapsed the Equipment into one. Took "Knowledge of the Ages" and corrected my spenditure log.

Because at the time of that discussion, its was "Tags AND Types" meaning I could strip someone from using their attack stat (so the damage was guaranteed to be minimal). I no longer do that second, more powerful ability, so I substituted in the ability to mess with Status Effects instead. And while I still can dodge roll after using this ability, this isn't a free action in the idea that I just do it and can continue having my turn normally. Not entirely. All I can do on that Response Phase is dodge (so I don't force myself to get hit for using the ability). It shuts off all the "Knowing the Elements" skills, RPJ, etc. This is your RPJ for the turn, essentially. There IS an idea: To make a Soseigan Hijutsu that strips the statuses out as an RPJ, putting a hardlock on #times per battle and making so I can't do BOTH at once (since you cant disassemble+RPJ). I could accept that as a compromise. But I feel like an advanced system that is entirely defensive should have the ability to statusblock/statusnegate. Its like, the Brick Wall Eye. I could also consider making it an ability I can only activate during my Set-up Phase, so it can never apply TO ME, and just to other people, but then I'd 100% make an RPJ to cover myself, because being able to do something for other people but not myself feels weird, strategy wise.

Kagemane: I had it's 'rank' effect in the skill portion, but I moved it from the skill portion into the jutsu itself for easy access, and because of changes to Neckbind. All other changes adopted. Neckbind: After much mathing, I split Kage Kubishibari into three jutsu, because damnit it is not possible to balance in our current system. A Chunnin, Jounin, and Sennin counterpart, each with the Forced Evolving mechanic, now named Lesser Neckbind, Neckbind, and Greater Neckbind. Each counterpart is the same, just adjusting the variables. Each one immediately inflicts 3 turns of choking [and pays for it up front], and has the added effect of "For the next three turns, if you suffer choking damage then you increase the choking turn counter, and if you're under a Hijutsu Kagemane, your breakout rolls get harder." This is a cleaner, more guaranteed bonus, but I lessened the bonuses significantly to adjust for this. The bonus is still interruptible, as anything that stops or prevents the choke prevents all of the bonus damage. Lesser Neckbind: Cost is [75 + 2x] Chakra, which in Chunnin will cap around 195 Chakra. It is below cost to balance how expensive Kagemane is at this rank, taking in mind you use them together. I almost didn't make this version because when coupled with kagemane, it is frightfully expensive and is likely to never get used as is, but I wanted the option because canonically, chunnin can perform this jutsu. Deals 1x damage, which is about 60 damage at the upper echelons, and increases the Choking turn counter by 1/15th of your level rounded down, which at level 60 is 4. Overall, this boosts your choking damage by 240 by the end of the jutsu and sets you up for a nasty choke chain combo, which totals at 300 Damage. I granted the jutsu's skill lock a rough 150 CP which translates to 225 damage if spent outright. I shot UNDER that a little, since that would allow me to crack up to 345 Damage. So this SHOULD now be within tolerable thresholds. Neckbind: Cost is [75 + 3x] Chakra, which in Jounin will cap around 390 Chakra assuming level 105. Deals 2x damage, which is about 210 damage at the upper echelons, and increases the Choking turn counter by 1/12th of your level rounded down, which at level 105 is 8. Overall, this boosts your choking damage by 480 by the end of the jutsu and sets you up for a nasty choke chain combo, which totals at 690 Damage. I granted the jutsu's skill lock a rough 225 CP which translates to 337 damage if spent outright (bringing the cap to almost 700 exact). I dealt less direct damage, only dealing 210, so that you end at 690, which is just under this number. Let me know if I need to revisit. Greater Neckbind: Cost is [75 + 4x] Chakra, which in Senin will cap around 555 Chakra assuming level 120. Deals 4x damage, which is about 480 damage at the upper echelons, and increases the Choking turn counter by 1/10th of your level rounded down, which at level 120 is 12. Overall, this boosts your choking damage by 720 by the end of the jutsu and sets you up for a nasty choke chain combo, which totals at 1200 Damage. I granted the jutsu's skill lock a rough 300 CP which translates to 450 damage if spent outright (bringing the cap to around 1150). I dealt 480 direct damage, so that you end at 1200, which is a little above this number. Let me know if I need to revisit. The only elephant in the room now is that if you chain choking beyond these turns you benefit in huge, giant ways, but then, thats true of anyone who can chain choking for a significant number of turns.

These are weird because you are paying for the chance to potentially do nothing. Which is odd. So I think 80 is fine. The last one, however, has a definite effect that is always on and can be priced. Its cost should be .1yx or (10%yx) where y is equal to how many elements you are adding, and x is equal to the base cost of the barrier in question. You can also use a simplified "See effect" and then explain that for each element you are adding, this jutsu costs 10% of the cost of the barrier. You are just paying that effect FOR them. But it still needs to be paid for.

Alright, here we go! So first, none of these have level or rank requirements, so I can take the Final Awakening as a level 0 if I amass enough SP. (Which is doable since you can start with 10 SP, more if you have a Death Bonus). Which is cool but also nuts. Fix please. ___________ Second, your wording on your stat boost makes them almost useless. "This may not cumulatively increase the user's stats beyond a value equal to 1 times the user's total natural energy stat" means that if you have 100 Natural Energy, you cant increase any stat beyond a Total Value of 100. So...this bloodline is only for shoring up your weak stats? Because even at level 15, most of your stats that you USE will be above 150. At level 120, all your important stats SHOULD be above 1200, which means this does nothing. Given that your stats only last until you turn off your bloodline, and then if you turn it back on you can pick different stats, you should never run into the scenario where you can give yourself stats twice. If someplace in your mind that scenario exists, please share it so we can fix it. You can eliminate that line because of course you cannot spend more Natural Energy than you possess. If the goal is to not let the total stat increase exceed 1200 (meaning, 400, 400, 400 when spread three ways) then use this wording: "The total stat increase provided by this ability cannot exceed 10x, where x is the user's level". Yes, when you are less than level 10 this means your stat boost is hella low....but you're also less than level 10, which does not last long. ____________ Third, I would put "up to 3" "up to 2" when talking about stat boosts at later ranks. BECAUSE, as it is now, sometimes, I might want to just turn on Rank 1. It has lower penalties, and if I only need to boost my Speed to ungodly, inhuman amounts, or crank Evasion cuz my opponent stacks Accuracy, why turn on the three-fer bloodline? I can get 1200 Stat at rank 1 and level 120. OR 600 + 600 at Rank 2, which is probably the money spot. I rarely would need 400 + 400 + 400. ____________ Fourth, speaking of penalties. A coin flip every turn to lose control of myself...feels bad. This is PERSONAL PREFERENCE so feel free to disregard it, but losing control of your character just isn't fun. Having a random target mechanic just feels bad. I would come up with an alternate "Bloodlust" mechanic that isn't "Attack dEveryone". Possibly something that forces you to use a jutsu that deals Physical Damage every turn while under Bloodlust. Or you can only use jutsu that do not inflict Status Effects. Or that says you can't Dodge Roll. Something Significant but something that can be played around in some way. Something that implies you have lost the "smart" half of your brain, and are left with The Beast. I can't play around "Random Target something hope you don't hit the wrong thing". I can play around a punishing but fair restriction to my action economy. Preferably, you want to build around something that can still make use of the bloodline abilities even when Bloodlusted. Make the bloodline have synergy, not dysfunction. Additionally, MORE losing control as you rank up...also feels wrong. Usually as you rank up you gain more control over it. I'd be okay with it always being like a static 25% Bloodlust chance, and using the abilities causing bloodlust for NEXT turn to go up, so that if you use them both, and you regen Natural Energy you are at 50%. OR something. Something you can play with. Cuz as it is, I never want to turn on Rank 3, which should be when I feel my most powerful. ______________ Fifth, you can remove mention of caps in all your things (or leave in the "this breaks caps" but caps are really a Creation thing, not an "in battle" thing). This is an Advanced System whose purpose is to make you big and scary, and when bloodlusted, you already ignore caps. So...you can ignore caps but you also must still obey them? I say pump your damage and go for it. This is a high roller bloodline, there should be a high roller reward. If I can trap you into being stuck as I come down on you with my 2100 Base Damage jutsu while Bloodlusted for an additional 20%....well you did that to yourself somehow.