Shinzui Bunshin No Jutsu | Essence Clone Skill | 真髄分身の術

[cntrstrk14]

 

• Izanagi to Izanami no Junkan | The Cycle of Izanagi & Izanami | 伊弊諾と伊弉冉の循環
Effect: Characters with this skill may purchase ‘Shinzui Bunshin No Jutsu’. 
Description: Perhaps one of the most fabled techniques in the history of the ninja wars, the Essence Clone is the supreme and near perfect replication of a human being, or at least that is what it is believed to be. An essence clone is by no doubt the closest known skill to the perfect human clone, but it comes with inherent flaws that one would expect when you try and create a complicated being. The knowledge needed to perform this complicated ninjutsu is said to date back to Izanagi and Izanami themselves, the two halves of the wheel that make life and death. 
Requirements:
- Divine Scroll of the 34 Forbidden Arts -or- a Teacher

- Forty (40) post training thread
- Level 100 & Sennin Rank
Cost: -1 SP

 

 

• Shinzui Bunshin No Jutsu | Essence Clone Skill | 真髄分身の術
Type: Ninjutsu [Construction Kinjutsu | Divine Scroll of the 34 Forbidden Arts]
Rank: Sennin [Sealing | Clone | Forbidden; Unacceptable]
Cost: 1500 Chakra
Effects:

- The Essence Clone has 100%* of the user's stats, including Health.
- Essence Clones, upon creation, gain access to twenty* (20) SP worth of skills from their creator.
- The user is considered to be under the effects of 'Quarantine; Ninjutsu' on their following turn.

- This technique may be used one (1) time per battle.
- Refer to the Essence Clone Rules for additional information.

Description: Perhaps one of the most fabled techniques in the history of the ninja wars, the Essence Clone is the supreme and near perfect replication of a human being, or at least that is what it is believed to be. An essence clone is by no doubt the closest known skill to the perfect human clone, but it comes with inherent flaws that one would expect when you try and create a complicated being. The Essence Clone is closer to the creation of life than it is a simple cloning technique. The high chakra density needed to make such a perfect likeness of the user also causes irregularities with the emotional state and self awareness of the clone. The clone itself, from ‘birth' will see itself as a separate individual and not a simple copy. Often they will even show this in their language, as they call their original ‘father' rather than by their name. The technique was brought back to life, or discovered, by Alchem Syaoran, whom dedicating just under four years to the uncovering of myths or legendary techniques, went to great extents to find a way to make the perfect clones. The end result of his hard study and practice is this, the Essence Clone. After so much work and dedication Syaoran has concluded that it may near be impossible to create an exact clone of one's self, at least for someone of his own limited power he admits. The reason for this is because as you try and create a closer replication of yourself you must also increase the complexity of the clone until it is near human like in workings. As would be expected, with this comes things that are beyond the realm of human knowledge, and quite frankly out of human control. Almost an absolute definition of the 'perfect cloning', it seems that only one clone may be forged at a time, acting as a separate human being. It is very important the remember though that even though it may seem like life birthing, it is merely the highest achievement in an age old technique style that has been used by ninja for hundreds of years. It seems that only Alchem Syaoran has been able to give rise to a skill such as this, and without explicit training, it may not be copied. Due to the requirement of the knowledge that Syaoran has obtained and hidden, without his personal guidance, it is not possible to replicate this skill in anyway. Furthermore, even the Sharingan fails to hold potential of copying this impressive Kinjutsu, as there is only one seal required, the rest requiring a certain type of knowledge...
"The Essence Clones body is a complicated compilation of elements and workings, to create a mocking of a human body. A shell of flesh like material with all necessary circulatory and chakra systems running throughout it make up the main portion of the clone. The flesh of the clone is not living tissue, and thus will not regenerate or heal on its own. The clone itself has no internal organs unless it is necessary for a bloodline ability. The ‘heart' is merely a central area that controls all the passing and pumping of chakra and blood throughout the body, and in actuality does not resemble a heart more than it resembles a pump. Once this shell is created the user will imprint a copy of their genetics upon the clone, which if visible would appear as a seal upon their ‘heart'. This imprint is merely a ‘carbon copy' of the creator's DNA, and within making this copy lies many of the problems that arise in the clone. Because this carbon copy can never be made perfectly, small discrepancies are found in small things, such as physical appearance. Furthermore, when this ‘carbon copy' is placed and sealed upon the clone it becomes distorted slightly, as if being viewed through a bend piece of glass. Overall, it is important to remember that the clone is not a living being, or even being held within a living shell of a body. It is merely a mocking of a body mixed with sealing jutsu to create the closest possible (to my knowledge) copy of a human being short of playing God." -Alchem Syaoran
Requirements:

- Izanagi to Izanami no Junkan

Points: 26

[cntrstrk14]

Essence Clone Rules~
(1) A character may only possess one (1) Essence Clone at any time
(2) If the creator does not possess the skill 'Izanagi to Izanami no Junkan' the clone has 75% of the user's stats and may learn up to ten (10) skill points instead.

(3) E. Clones are visually distinguishable from the original due to variations in body structure and ‘genetics‘ due to the process involved to make them. These changes will be noted for slightly different hair, eye, and possibly skin color
(4) E. Clones are distinguishable from human beings, but only too the medically trained or the inordinately keen

(5) When gaining skills from the user, the points paid is based on the points the creator paid for those skills
(6) E. Clones may exhibit Bloodlines from their creator. When gaining skills from their creator, an E. Clone may only spend half as many skill points into the Bloodline as their creator has. This can be amended or changed based on a staff decision, especially if a Bloodline does not have balanced or clear skill point expenditure
(7) E. Clones have an expiration date of one (1) in game week, but may be voluntarily destroyed at whim of creator. The creator may also extend the life of a clone by another in game week, but must perform the technique once again. Clone retains all of its memories and physical appearance changes, but is treated as if it was just made at that point. Only the original creator may extend the life of a clone
(8) E. Clones may exhibit human feelings such as love, hate, anger, etc. More often than not these manners are along the same lines as the user, though they are not necessarily so
(9) E. Clones may not be healed, even after a battle, unless by a technique made specifically to do so due to the unique composition of their body
(10) E. Clones may only aid their creator during a battle if they were created in that particular battle.
(11) E. Clones receive ‘fragmented‘ pieces of their owner‘s memory, and when trying to recall memories usually become frustrated and confused. This is caused by the use of imprinted genetics which especially effects memories of the clone
(12) E. Clones may never be revived; they may only be replaced
(13) E. Clones must remain within twenty (20) kilometer of their creator, or they instantaneously perish
(14) E. Clones are loyal to their creator, many times seeing them as a father figure, or a brother, depending on the initial mood of the clone
(15) When the creator dies the E. Clones loses all combat abilities but continues to live for up to one (1) in game hour, during which they slowly start to dissolve. At the end of the hour they cease to exist completely
(16) The E. Clone may not give or receive any bloodline transfusion or have their bloodline stolen
(17) E. Clones may not procreate successfully

[cntrstrk14]

Designer Notes

- Previously approved version can be found here.

- Updated to be a skill locked jutsu.

- Restricted to one use per battle.

- Updated wording in technique to be more concise and rely more on Clone rules rather than redefine them all.

- Updated technique to inflict user with Quarantine; Ninjutsu rather than reduce Ninjutsu to 25% on the following turn. More in line with flavor and cleaner.

- Updated general wording and language in rules. 

- Added rule (2). 

- Removed previous rule (4), (7), (8), (9) (11), (12), and (15).

- Reworked rule (5) based on skill point expenditure

- Updated wording on rule (13) because referring to Syaoran by name was dumb.

- Updated wording on rule (15) to allow for more fun RP. Previously was strangely restrictive.

- Updated wording on rule (16) to lean more heavily on newer understanding of equipment.

- Greatly extended the range of the E. Clone in rule (18) as I believe I just had bad understanding of distances when I was younger.

- Removed rule (23) as it was redundant with clone rules.

- Removed rule (24) because it was oddly specific and was a concern of past NA and not current NA.

 

[Kouta]

Just looking at pure cost, without consideration of any additional rules you're breaking, these should Cost 3112 Chakra per Clone.

Mathline:

Your own math puts 100% stats at 236 + 476 on its own. So we're at 712 Just for Stats.

Then if every -1 SP is 40 CP, and your clone can theoretically gain 60 SP worth of skills (All non-bloodline) thats 2400 for the Skill point totals. And before you ask "Is it necessary to price them at the full 60 SP when they don't get high level access to bloodlines" Yes, yes it is because every other jutsu with a variable amount automatically assumes the highest possible denominator when being paid for. These should be no different.

Edited November 19, 2015 by Kouta

[cntrstrk14]

Adjusted how skill points work on the clone. They now use a point buy system. Adjusted how they interact with bloodlines as well because of this.

[Kouta]

We still haven't resolved the whole Health and Defense bits. I think the general consensus among the skypes was that they still should receive no Defense to fit Clone rules, but that they could have 100% of your HP + that initial defense mod.

Also with your changes, your new cost would be 1912 Chakra. 1200 would only pay for the skill points. So might I suggest 1500? Meet in the middle?

What we thinking?

Edited November 20, 2015 by Kouta

[Cellar Door]

There needs to be a simple-ish counter-play for this.

My reasoning here is that it kind of fucks up the mentality of clones. When we were making them, our whole idea with them was that they weaker because they gave the user a wider breadth of ability. More things could be done with them. This technique is more like a stronger summon, because it creates what is basically an exact duplicate of the user on the field.

Summons are very strong, and are considered one of the best value systems in the game, even with the three SP it takes to procure them. This is a whole step stronger than that, because the ally created is much, much more versatile, gaining the user's whole compliment of jutsu and an amount of skills that can be chosen upon creation which allows you to tailor it to your needs on the battlefield.

You could basically call this technique "I win" because fighting two full-force 120+ ninja even by a ninja of comparable power would be impossible.

[cntrstrk14]

Adjusted the cost to 1500 as that seemed fair. Also for the HP, the user gains 100% of all stats and functions as a normal clone, so defense mod would be added to HP then.

 

Unsure what kind of counter-play you are thinking of. It would seem odd to give this specific counter play but not give similar counter play to a 75% clone that would cost a fraction of the cost of this jutsu (in both JP and Chakra). I'm open to the idea, I would just also want to discuss where the line is where this new counter play needs to be added.

[Cellar Door]

I think the full-compliment of skills and 100% speed are the line. Most clones are easy to deal with because they have less options in battle. The two things that really make them easy to handle are the lack of skills and the diminished speed. A character that moves as fast as Syaoran, and has all of his skills is effectively a second Syaoran (dur) and that makes him equally as hard to deal with. A good counter-play mechanic would be better in my mind than a massive chakra cost.

Edited November 24, 2015 by Cellar Door

[Cellar Door]

Skill-locking this would be a good idea. Um, the cost on this mathematically would be something like 1900-2000 for just the Skills and the stats, but you can probably bring that down by paying SP. Since that's all that is really handled in the actual technique effect, I'll move onto the rules.
 

(1) Only one Essence Clone may exist at any given time from a single user
1: A character may only possess 1 'Essence Clone' at any time.

(2) Essence Clones are distinguishable from the original (variations in body structure and ‘genetics‘ due to the process involved to make them) and will be noted for slightly different hair, eye, and possibly skin color
(fine)

(3) Essence Clones are distinguishable from human beings, but only too the medically trained or the inordinately keen
(This could be part of 2.)

(4) Essence Clones may never manipulate Forbidden, Summoning, Cloning or any type of technique that involves giving birth to life
(This doesn't need to exist. Clones now have inherent limiters on what they can do, by virtue of just being clones.)

(5) E. Clones may exhibit Bloodlines from their creator. When gaining skills from their creator, an E. Clone may only spend half as many skill points into the Bloodline as their creator has. This can be amended or changed based on a staff decision, especially if a Bloodline does not have balanced or clear skill point expenditure
(This is something that should probably be stipulated in the technique, I'd put it in the line where you allot the amount of skills. It's also wordier than it has to be.)

(6) E. Clones have an expiration date of one (1) in game week, but may be voluntarily destroyed at whim of creator. The creator may also extend the life of a clone by another in game week, but must perform the technique once again. Clone retains all of its memories and physical appearance changes, but is treated as if it was just made at that point. Only the original creator may extend the life of a clone
(Ehhhhhhhhhh. Okay. This is probably one of those ones that you'll want to keep just because you like the words.)

(7) E. Clones may only gain skills that their creator has at the time of creation

(... Unnecessary. Clones don't possess levels and can't accrue experience. Creation is the only time they could get SP, since they don't have an editable sheet.)

(8) E. Clones may never positively benefit their user in Training
(As a clone this also goes without saying. I mean, a skill could be created. Since Naruto obviously benefited from his own clones. In the long run its .5 per line. I don't think allowing training with them would be unreasonable if they made a skill.)

(9) E. Clones may exhibit human feelings such as love, hate, anger, etc. More often than not these manners are along the same lines as the user, though they are not necessarily so
(Shadow Clones seem to do this anyhow in the shows and stuff. I would say you can just skip this as a rule. It's made pretty evident in the description that they're autonomous creations. Flavor doesn't really need a rule.)

(10) E. Clones may not be healed, or heal (even after battle) unless by a technique made specifically to do so due to the unique composition of their body
(I think making them unable to heal is a bad choice. It would inherently make the clones worthless to use with a medic, which seems strange, especially since the clone can even take the medical skills that the user possesses. I would say allowing them to heal others is fine, and them being healed is your call, but that also seems like a handwaivey limiter from a long time ago that doesn't need to happen. Two medics with 1500 points devoted to Ninjutsu and Chakra would having some longevity, but I don't think they'd have good offensive capability.)

(11) E. Clones may not siphon Chakra or Stamina from an opponent
(An old layover from when drains were a total death sentence. I think this is another BS limiter that RN just tacked on.)

(12) E. Clones may not be copied by any means. To learn the technique one must spend great time dedicated to the art as well as train with a character who knows the technique
(Just basic, old school, Uchiha hate. I'd say axe this one.)

(13) E. Clones may only aid their creator during a battle if created in that particular battle. If an E. Clone is engaged within a battle on their own, the battle must be monitored by staff to determine the outcome (if it holds any significance)
(I think this would be easy enough to just throw into the actual effect. "At the end of battle, any 'Essence Clones' under user's control are no longer under their control.')

(14) E. Clones receive ‘fragmented‘ pieces of their owner‘s memory, and when trying to recall memories usually become frustrated and confused. This is caused by the use of ‘imprinted genetics‘ which especially effects memories of the clone
(Again, this is probably covered in the enormous description that nobody wants to read. It's another fluff rule.)

(15) E. Clones obtain copies of all equipment and items a player has on them when the clone is created. These copied items lose all Special Abilities. If these items leave the possession or immediate vicinity of the E. Clone they begin to destabilize and will disintegrate if rapidly moved. Any additional items acquired by the E. Clone during it's lifetime will be left behind upon their expiration
(This would increase the cost of a clone by quite a bit. Since you could be gaining multiple level 100 weapons with attributes and stuff. I definitely think it either needs to be addressed in the effect itself or removed entirely. I don't like this effect at all. It's a little place where this seems stealth-borked.)

(16) E. Clones may never be revived; they may only be replaced
(Just standard clone stuff here, but if you really want it, feel free to keep it.)

(17) E. Clones must remain within twenty (20) kilometer of their creator, or they instantaneously perish
(Sure.)

(18) E. Clones are loyal to their creator, many times seeing them as a father figure, or a brother, depending on the initial mood of the clone
(More fluff that could be handled by the devil description.)

(19) E. Clones can live for up to one (1) in game hour after the death of the creator. During which they slowly start to dissolve. At the end of the hour they cease to exist completely
(... So do these become NPC's after a battle or what? What is the purpose of these words here? What would an Essence Clone do after it's creator died? Because I really don't like the notion that someone could kill a person, and then the battle has to continue because their jizzy super-clone has an hour of borrowed time. This is probably something that would affect the cost of the technique because it means you have to kill Sy twice. Another rule that I do not like at all, and don't think will fly.)

(20) The E. Clone may not give or receive any bloodline transfusion or have their bloodline stolen
(A good and proper stipulation, but should be in the skill section of the effect, and not down here.)

(21) E. Clones may not procreate successfully
(Also an unnecessary rule that can be handled in the description.)

 

Okay, so in summation, this needs to cost more, or you need to pay SP, and then getting free weapons/items/armor and living past the creator are the only rules hiding in that big stack of rules that won't fly as is. I made notations on what I think needs to be there and doesn't, but if its just fluff, it is naturally your call. I do not like that actual effects are hiding in fluff though, and you need to either move anything with a mechanical effect to the Effect section, or move fluff stuff to the Description section.

[Cellar Door]

No Activity; Dead

[cntrstrk14]

• Made this a skill locked jutsu. Was going to make it -2, but I felt the 8000 words was more flavorful and worth more than -1 SP as even at CXP levels an A Rank mission gives more than enough EXP to get -1 SP and have money and EXP left over. This places the cost somewhere around -2.5?

• Removed and updated a lot of rules from the rules section based on KC's feedback.

• Reduced the number of SP the clone gets from 30 to 20, revisiting this I felt that 30 was far too much.

• Removed rules that gave the clones equipment, too easy to break. 

[Cellar Door]

This is looking about as good as it's going to get without test data. Soooo, I guess yes?

[PandaMattMatt]

APPROVED

[Yurane]

Did you guys approve it without reading the rules on it or what Tony said?

 

http://prntscr.com/h843cm

 

It still states that it gets all your equipment.

[cntrstrk14]

Fixed! Good catch, not sure how that didn't get removed.

[Cellar Door]

Does the clone get your current value or your total value in tank statistics?

[Princess]

Clone rules state:
"• All clones bear a fraction of their creator's base statistics (aside from Health), with the exact percentages detailed in each individual Clone Technique, and are otherwise treated as another combatant."

That fraction is 100%, but as no special mention of difference between standard rules and essence clones in terms of stats is stated, one can safely assume it is the base statistics that the 100% is derived from.

Now, my question!

In order to stop you from spawning a whole second body with max stats to fight out the entire battle for you (essentially utterly nullifying the expenditure of 1,500 chakra) I was asked to ensure they kept a battle limit when sharing a thread with the creator (given I have the only other 100% clone technique it's a fair comparison). Now mine are cheaper and weirdly built, but would you consider limiting the amount of time they can spend in battle with their creator? I'm not saying destroy them after four turns, but maybe limit them to four turns alongside their creator? Else convince me they don't deserve that restriction (they do cost 500 chakra more than mine but gain 10 additional SP, which costs 400 of that, so is essentially becoming a summon worth 100 chakra?).